Home?

I am finding it hard to express what I am experiencing here. Hunger… too simple a word. Exhaustion… too common a word. Homesick…where do I belong anyway? I am already thinking how I will be able to establish a normal life in America. I don’t know how to fit in. The things I have seen no one can imagine.

Baby Brenda’s eyelashes haunt me. Will she die? And Cissy… will she feel lonely? She asked me not to leave her. What can I do? And so many other faces penetrate my dreams. I don’t know how to bury my thoughts so I can sleep. Part of me wants to be ignorant; maybe go back to a nice 9 to 5 job. I can’t.

And so I think of them again… I am planning for their futures. I am thinking about how to help them succeed. I am wishing them life instead of death.