Poisonous Caterpillars, Monkeys and Hot Milk

June 4, 2006 at 1:15 a.m.

A whole day in Rwanda… there are definitely new things I am learning about the country as a full-timer. Like the fact that there are these really bad caterpillars here. And monkeys can attack randomly and sniff out carefully placed poison in a banana and eat around it. Also, imported chicken has been outlawed to prevent bird flu and a local chicken is hard to find! Big yellow beetles exist in places other than Madagascar. Milk should be served cold, not hot…as it is here.

These are all things I just learned today. Of course, some things we learned the hard way. Like the caterpillar that left its fur in Nate’s foot. It can eat away the skin like acid and the local cure is said to be the best… salt and water paste. It did dissolve most of the fur, but I am waiting to find out if the morning will bring good news or bad. Fortunately we did not have a monkey attack any of us. That happened to Travis’s little girl and they tried to poison the monkeys living in the trees in their compound. Like I mentioned before, the stinkin thing figured out how to eat around the poison! Yikes!

Things were laid back today. Travis and Astrid (GFR Directors) brought Ben and the younger three kids to Hotel Novotel to use the beautiful pool. This is a local missionary hang out of sorts. Get this; it even has a small diving board. I stayed home and nursed Amber. She is getting better, but feels so frustrated about not being herself. She has admitted to feeling weak, not just in body but in spirit.

I have to say that this whole experience with her has validated my own emotions tremendously. Everytime she discusses a struggle in her mind, I recognize it as something I have felt personally. I guess I have always felt the same as she has now, that I am terribly weak because of my inability to adapt easily or becoming overly emotional. But seeing this unfold in front of me, I can honestly say from a mother’s perspective that I feel so proud of her for taking each step of progress hour by hour. I don’t feel at all impatient or angry… as I unconsciously assumed God has been of me. I feel compassion and I want to embrace her in her moment of fear. WOW! What a difference from some of the ways I had viewed myself during times of utter disillusionment and despair! Even going into downtown Kigali today took a toll on her and Hope both. They felt so sad about children begging outside our car windows and a woman who had both legs and one arm cut off who was shuffling down the street with a baby on her back. I will never forget her flip flops holding on to her stumped thighs and the yellow umbrella she carried with her one good arm. Although, this time my focus seemed more towards my children as we witnessed these things together. Amber and Hope felt sick to their stomach and didn’t know how to handle the fact that people could not live without help. I am truly astounded by the boys ability to endure the changes. They want to go into the village and it seems like we are holding them back somewhat. And honestly, I have always felt that about Ben… that I was holding him back somehow. Now I am looking at this as more of a teaching lesson for all of us together. We are a team and we can not push someone who is not ready and neither should we hold back completely. We still must go on as God called us, but we will go at a pace we can all adjust to. It is a balancing act!

I received so much hope today through this struggle. I am grateful for the new perspective. God is doing so much in my heart to heal ME! He is speaking to my heart of his love for ME. Praise God for His amazing wisdom! I also was able to Skype home today and talk to Ruth via internet. We both have web cams and it was awesome to see her face to face even though we are a world away. So despite the crazy caterpillars, tearful realizations of poverty and trauma and even sickness, I am going to bed encouraged!