James Joseph

Last weekend Ben and I went to a college football game. We had so much fun watching things up close and personal. Someone gave us tickets to the Michigan vs. Miami Ohio game in ROW 4! There was so much energy in the crowd and we had a ball seeing those healthy college boys running around by the dozens.

I guess that may sound funny to some people. But I have seen far too FEW boys that age in Rwanda, Uganda and even Tanzania that are happy and healthy. Many of them are being taken captive for war, suffering of AIDS, or maybe they are dying before the age of 5 like the large majority of African children.

I began battling feelings of guilt knowing that I have 4 children, 2 of which are boys, that have EVERY opportunity to LIVE. I look forward to them going to college, playing athletics, singing in church, playing an instrument, following the career that interests them, having children, buying a house, and on it goes....

My children have so much. I have so much. But James Joseph does not. He is 18 and since he was 16 he has been battling elephantiasis. He now has a 12 pound scrotum and has no hope to live unless he has emergency surgery. A team member this summer met him and raised some money to help and more is needed. We need $460 to save this boys life. I hope we can. He deserves to LIVE and with your help, he will meet other goals too.

If you can help James, please email me at melody.pahlow@globalfamilyrescue.org or mail a check to GFR at P.O. Box 529, Wheaton, Illinois 60187

Panera

I am sitting at Panera Bread and going over the last few months. I have been feeling a special pull on my heart lately for the poor in Africa once again. Even here I am aware of the abundance of America and my heart sinks as I look at the food items listed for sale. There are so many choices of foods. I feel spoiled. I feel guilty too.

How is it that I have all this? I can have soup today or a sandwich. I can choose a salad or a bagel. With the bagel I can choose butter or a spread. With the soup I can choose an apple or bread. The funny thing is that all of it tastes good and I can have two.

There is nothing I can say to compare my life to the villages we work in. The dominating food would be casava. It is a white root similar to a potato. There is usually no salt for them to increase flavors. They make stew with it but the water they boil it in is filthy and brown. They stir it with a long stick. It tastes bland and starchy and there are no other choices.

I wish I could bring one of them here to experience this. But then again, I would feel embarrased too. How could I explain the wealth and abundance here and the lack of the basics there? It is a puzzle.

Ben is doing better. The doctors put him through tons of tests. One doctor told me he needs to manage his stress better and relax. Ha! I still don't know how to make him do that! When I see him start to fume at the kids or one of the 3 dogs, I start yelling, "Relax!" I don't really think that is working!

Back in the States

Well, I am back in Naperville with the kids. Ben also came home this week in order to have his heart checked out. We also have been trying to stay in touch with the next team that was leaving on July 2 and arriving on July 4. There was a huge problem in London when they missed their connecting flight to Nairobi. Peter Alexander and Debbie Damron have been waiting in various airports for days. I feel so awful for them! Hopefully they will be in Uganda today. I will keep you posted.

Say A Prayer....

Today I had some great news! The woman I met named Rose has been sponsored! Plus, we have raised $1400 for her house! Thank you to those who have donated so far. There is another $1400 needed. Please contact me if you can help in anyway at all melody@globalfamilyrescue.org or you can donate online with Paypal at www.globalfamilyrescue.org in the donations area.

However, I have to confess, I have seen better days. This job is painful. Sometimes my stomach feels like there is a stone in it and I can’t seem to get out of the funk. Today I feel so overwhelmed by needs. I walked into the village and I was swarmed by people asking for help; this daughter has epilepsy, that son has malaria, those women have a stomach ache, those mother’s teeth are rotting. I have to say I think I know a little about what Christ felt when he walked into a new town. His reputation preceded him and people began begging for help.

It makes sense that if people see hope in me, they reach out and ask. They ask for help in such private physical things. I see when they are truly desperate, they will walk for miles. Today I met a woman who was less than 5 feet tall. Her face was etched with pain and suffering but it wasn’t for herself that she came… it was her 9 month old son who was burning up with fever. I have seen this so often here – the dreaded disease malaria. Of course, one of the team members fronted the $15 immediately for a clinic visit and medicine. I hope that little boy lives. But that was only one problem in over 50 that were brought to me in about an hours time. Talk about feeling helpless. I was totally at a loss. Many of these people needed basic care, others had life threatening diseases. I saw a 3 year old boy with a hernia, a woman with terrible ulcers, 3 children with epilepsy, 8 starving children, 1 widow with a severe back issue, 3 arthritis conditions, countless other headaches, 2 insane girls, and 1, get ready for this, hermaphrodite.

I have never felt so incapable. There is so much to do and I can’t do it alone. I don’t know if I will ever be able to do it all…. but I need to try to do something.

Jimmy

My main concern right now is Jimmy. I have never had the opportunity to meet someone in his condition. His mother was very secretive and talked in hushed tones. Apparently no one else knows that Jimmy was born with both female and male parts. He is only 11 but I can see that he has begun to develop. We gave money for him to see a specialist in the capital city, but I know he will need more for surgery. He is currently using his female parts to urinate and I don’t know if the male parts even work. What am I supposed to do about this? I am totally stumped. I know that someone may be able to donate the cost of a surgery… but what of his changed life? Will he be a boy or a girl? Can you imagine this happening in a village? I can’t tell you how terrible this is for him and the family. He will be seen as a devil and be an outcast. In this situation, there is a good chance the family will have to move to a new area and start a new life. How can I relocate an entire family? Africa is NOT such a big place. People know you from your tribe and things get back to people. And what about the other family members, how can they understand this? I am still trying to think my way through it and figure out the best scenario here.

Well, I am rambling. I will try to keep you up to date on Jimmy. Hopefully we will have things resolved before any more major developmental stages. If you remember, say a prayer for him tonight. He will need it.

I Hate Being Sick

I got sick, really sick. I hate that! I am the worst patient ever. I complain like crazy and nothing satisfies me, especially when I am nauseous. Ben has proved to be incredibly forbearing with me however. I absolutely love having him around when I feel under the weather. He is so helpful! I couldn’t go with the team to Kamwenge and Ben stayed back to bring Mike and me to the doc.

I am much better now… doc said I probably ate something that didn’t agree with me. I am SURE that was the problem. However, it was a blessing to spend the time with Ben anyway. After NOT seeing him for 5 weeks, I have missed him so much.

Here is the pic he took of me today when we took Rick to see his family in Kampala. That was really fun. The mom was so grateful that at one point she buried her head in Rick’s shoulder. She could not believe all the gifts she was receiving! I love how this kind of thoughtfulness blessed her until she was speechless!

I also spent some time sharing shoes and earrings with some of the neighbors at the house. I have never worn heals in the field, but we had a meeting prior so I dressed up a little. Lesson for today; Girls love to be beautiful wherever you are in the world!

A Rose Among Thorns

There is little I can say to explain the devastation of a woman alone here.  I have seen a lot of women who could barely look me in the eyes… but Rose takes the cake.  I met her in a small town near at the Kenyan border.  

Rose has four children.  The oldest is 14.  When I was introduced to Rose her large brown eyes stayed fixed on my feet.  I asked the translator to have her look at me.  She glanced up and looked away.  It was then that I was told Raymond, one of our field officers, had been taking care of this family.  He and his wife have 7 children of their own and they still took Rose in.  For that, Rose is lucky.  She is extremely vulnerable in her position and if she is not cared for soon, she will need to prostitute herself in order to feed her children.  You see, Rose’s husband left her alone and then at her lowest point, her small house burnt down.  She is absolutely destitute and I can’t say how terribly desperate I am to help her.

I am going to be blunt here.  Rose needs sponsorship.  But more than that, she needs a home. These children need a place to rest their heads.  Rose needs to know that she can close a door and lock away all the fears she has now.  Is there anyone that can help?  A house costs $2800 in total.  That includes a brick home, windows, and doors.  But giving Rose and her children this gift would be priceless.  Imagine yourself in this situation.  It is impossible to imagine it for myself.

There are others needing sponsorship as well.  This couple is caring for their grandchildren when all their children died of AIDS.  The children aren’t eating much and need food.  Please consider helping them

If you can offer any help, please email me at melody@globalfamilyrescue.org  

The Boy Who Inspired GFR Uganda

Ben and Melody with Humprey and his family
It has been over a year since I met with Humphrey in Uganda. Do you remember the story? Humphrey is the 17 year old boy I met last year with 4 brothers and 1 sister. His parents had both died of Aids. One he had just buried and the funeral pyre was still standing. It was when I met him on June 14^th of last year that I knew GFR was going to expand globally into this country. I will never forget the stoney face that I saw and the lack of emotion he expressed when I visited him. I could see the weight of the world resting on his shoulders. It was more than I could stand and I burst into tears.

Melody crying with Humprey last June

We went to visit the village Humphrey lives in and I didn’t see him when we gathered the families. I kept asking, “Where is Humphrey?” The ceremony began after some of the cheering died down. I was quietly sitting among the widows and suddenly he made his entrance in the back. Without any invitation, I got up and walked straight over to him. I reached out to hug him and I briefly saw the shocked look he made. Apparently Humphrey had no idea how much his story impacted me. I laugh now to think about it. This poor boy must have been completely embarrassed with the amount of attention I was paying him!

We had an opportunity to go back to his compound and spend some time finding out what has changed for him.

Melody interviewing Humphrey

I asked him lots of questions about his life now; eating (twice a day at least), sleeping (bed and mattresses), health (everyone is well including the youngest boy I was so concerned about last year), housing (a new hut for the children), livestock (a farm of goats and chickens), etc. His life has changed immensely. He was excited to point out his new cow and bicycle as well.

Humphrey's Cow in the background

Humphrey's Bike...how many kids can you fit on this???

He seemed reserved though. It seemed that he was a bit quiet for my taste. Usually families are more exuberant. It wasn’t until we brought out the soccer ball that I realized the problem with my thinking….

Humphrey playing soccer next to his parents graves

Humphrey began to chase the ball around and even seemed to forget that we were there. “Duh!”, I thought. This is a boy I am dealing with! I sometimes treat Humphrey like he is a man with all the responsibility of one. And while that is true… I have forgotten that this is a boy full of spirit and he needs to lay down those burdens too. The picture of Humphrey now says is all!

Humphrey June 2008

Angry at the World

I am so angry and frustrated. It happens when you are here a while. There are the tiny little things like no hot water, diarrhea, and no fast food. Then there are the big things like seeing mothers and fathers sick with AIDS, sick children, and without a doubt women that our constantly abused and neglected here. It is more than I can handle right now. It is all I can do not to scream. But what good will that do? I guess I will just write a brief synopsis of today…

We went to Namyoya. The church is really great. They are also in the process of building the pastors house too. We got to see one of the water wells that were completed and we were told that the other one is up and running. See Ben's blog for more photos on these projects.

Pastor David preached about Job. I found it interesting that he compared the village to Job by saying they were now reaping the benefits of patience as Job had. They were now, “blessed abundantly”. It blew me away. They still don’t have what I would want… chocolate, meat (I guess that should have come first), air conditioning, electricity or running water. I am really NOT surprised that they would feel so happy with the simple things like water from a well or a roof over their heads while they are praying. It is said that even the unchurched are celebrating in the village. I wish I could be so simple and content. I am trying hard… but it is not easy for me.

The ladies in our traditional dresses provided by Namyoya

Also met two sponsored families of the team members.

Deb and Chris meet with their widow

It was really exciting. Both were so ecstatic to meet their caregivers. Gene Weavers family was extremely difficult to see because Robert, the father, is dying of AIDS and his 13 year old daughter is taking care of everything including farming 2 acres of land by hand herself. I was told that Robert was once a strong man. He was wealthy owning several cows, farming his own land as an agriculturalist with lean muscle and light brown skin. This once attractive man sought out a wife worthy of him. She was beautiful as well. After giving birth to 5 children, she died in 2007. He sold everything he had to try to save her but it was too late. He has since stayed in his small dirty house crying so loud the neighbors could hear leaving Idah caring for the 4 other children. It breaks my heart to see him now, a broken slight man with bones protruding through his chest visible 20 feet away. The only glimmer of hope here is the sponsorship that the Weaver’s started last month. They even gave extra money in hopes that Anti-retroviral Drugs may be able to keep him alive until Idah is 16 or so. Then she will be an older orphan at least. But I have to tell you my faith feels small in the matter.

Gene and Robert

Maybe now you can understand why I am angry? It just doesn’t make any sense to me. I feel so helpless sometimes. I wish I had a magic wand to make it all ok. I go to sleep at night going over the faces wondering if each one is alright. Are they sleeping well? Have they eaten today? How can I get another one sponsored?

Please help me not be too late. If there is anyone you know that would be willing to sponsor a family for $64 a month, you can save a life. We are looking for approximately 75 more families in this village to be sponsored immediately. Please, won't you give someone a chance to live and email me today at melody@globalfamilyrescue.org

What soul on Earth doesn't deserve to live?

Mikey and Melody with baby

Sometimes you just want some fresh air…. Kampala is not one of those places. I guess I was hoping to breathe better after so many hours of airplane oxygen. I forgot how travel can wear a person out. It is no wonder why people in Europe travel for 3 or 4 weeks at a time so that they can recoop from the exhaustion. But, there is little you can do but suck it up when you need to move quickly.

I am really tired. I am down right pooped. We traveled a long distance (three separate flights with 18 hours of layovers) but we still wanted to “get there”. The team that we have with us is really amazing. Three dear friends from First Baptist Church in Liberal Kansas, and eleven of us from our home church Community Christian. I can’t tell you how much fun it is to travel with people who are all of the same mindset… “Transforming the World One Family at a Time” We were literally all on the edge of our seats as we drove for 6 hours to Busia Uganda.

In Busia we met some of the most wonderful people you have ever had the pleasure to meet. They cheered, sang and danced as they greeted us.

Melody addressing the widows in Busia

It made me laugh! I didn’t know what to do! I just watched until someone said, “Go and greet them!” I have to tell you I have no idea what that means technically other than a hug. So that is what I did! One old blind widow who could barely walk grabbed my arm and gushed, “Webaly! Webaly!” That means thank you in the Samia language. I took her hands and put them on my face. Her brown eyes covered with a milky blue film began to tear up. She smiled so big that I could see all of the places that she once had teeth. She did not hesitate and boldly investigated my face and hair until at last she pulled me into her arms again crying in her shaky cracked voice… “Webaly.”

Amidst all the noise and celebration that moment in time stays with me. Some would say she is only one old woman and that she has lost her senses along with her teeth so why should we seek to save her when there are so many others who will live longer and need help? Well, I guess it would be hard to understand. But I can’t help but hear her voice… “Webaly”… those words echo in my mind. What soul on Earth doesn’t deserve to live?

Magdalene

A photo I can't forget

Magdalene, the hope of a mother

Last week I heard news that Nakalula passed away.  Perhaps you remember the story I wrote of last year?  Nakalula was in the fifth stage of syphilis and her daughter Grace (then 17) was dying of AIDS?  I met them on a dirty and roach infested floor in Uganda.  I will never forget that fateful day.  It changed my life.  I will never forget the blessing of a bed when I am sick.  

Grace passed away in September and Nakalula passed away just last week.  The oldest child to care for 4 kids?  He is 12 and mentally handicapped.  So all hopes lie on a young girl named Magdalene.  She is 10.  That is the same age of my youngest daughter Hope.  The weight of the world on her shoulders?  Impossible.  I can't imagine the force of grief Magdalene is carrying.

With Global Family Rescue, she will not be totally alone; that is a certainty.  But Magdalene will never be a child again and there is nothing I can do about that.  It makes me crazy.  There are times I feel so powerless and this is one of them.  

We are waiting for the outcome of the funeral to see who will become guardian over this family.  Options are distant relatives or local families who have been aware of the situation intimately.  I don't know what will happen to Magdalene.  I am sitting here thinking that this is only one family of orphans to be concerned with.  And how many others are there in the world?